Bauer’s head reared back. “Huh.”
“Not all of us are professional snowboarders who probably have women throwing themselves naked on the snow in front of their board.”
Did I sound like a jealous harpy? Yup. Sure did.
Did I sound insecure that I’d been a late bloomer and didn’t feel the need to date my way through high school and college? Yup. That also.
“Naked on the snow sounds awful.” He gave me a sideways glance. “And entirely irrational, if one wanted to look sexy.”
Withdrawing my hand from his, I smacked him on the chest. His laughter boomed through the Jeep, and I found myself smiling.
“Ass.”
Bauer snatched my hand and kissed the palm. “Listen, I won’t lie, there are women who chase snowboarders like we’re a prize, but it can’t be that different from what any football player has to deal with.”
“No, I know. And there are so many guys who don’t chase that life.” I shook my head. “I shouldn’t have implied that you did.”
He sighed. “I wasn’t an angel. But most of that, it stayed behind me in my early twenties. It’s not as fun once you start creeping closer to thirty.” His cheeks were slightly pink.
“Are you saying you’ve had a dry spell lately, Bauer?” I teased.
His shrug was small. “A little. Isn’t this … isn’t this weird for you to talk about?”
“Is it weird if I told you about guys I dated?”
“That’s not the same.”
My head tilted. “Why not?”
He sighed. “Well … you’re like … girlfriend material, you know? Every parent in the world would be thrilled if a guy brought you home.”
Ahh. “And you’re not boyfriend material?”
Bauer licked his lips before he answered. “I wouldn’t know.”
“Hmm, well, let’s see.” Regarding him with a thoughtful expression, I waited until I saw his expression soften a bit. “You’re not terrible to look at.” He rolled his eyes, but he was smiling, so I kept going. “You are an excellent dancer.” My fingers trailed along the top of his hand. “You open doors and make pancakes. You shovel pathways in the snow.” I picked up that hand and pressed a kiss into his palm. “You wake me up in the sweetest, sexiest ways. And you make me feel beautiful.”
Bauer looked over at me, and what I saw in his eyes slayed me completely. “You are beautiful,” he said roughly.
“You make me feel amazing just by being you, Bauer.” I kept my voice even, despite the way my stomach fluttered nervously. “If that’s not boyfriend material, I don’t know what is.”
The man next to me stayed quiet, but I saw the strong column of his throat move on a slow swallow.
“Everyone has a past, Bauer. It doesn’t define who we are moving forward.” I gave a small shrug of my own. “So I won’t hold your past against you if you can promise to do the same for me.”
He tangled our fingers together again. “So I won’t imagine some ripped book nerd in your sociology class mooning over you because you guys dated for five years. Because that would probably do the same cute pouty thing to my face as yours just did when you talked about snow bunnies.”
I laughed. “Seriously, you’re such an ass.”
As he grinned, I felt my stomach flip weightlessly again.
Some ripped book nerd. No, I hadn’t dated one of those for five years, but in my head … one had taken up residence for even longer. If Bauer and I stayed together, and oh, my heart wanted that so badly, I’d eventually have to admit my harmless crush on Finn and how that played a role, but I knew this wasn’t the time.
The feeling of suspended reality that we’d enjoyed at the cabin still lingered in the Jeep. We drove through a winter wonderland so beautiful it didn’t seem real. I was with a man who gave me the kind of butterflies I didn’t know existed—like sex-crazed, I want to stay in a bed with you for a week and pluck every deep thought out of your head because your head is just as fascinating as your body kind of butterflies—and I wasn’t ready to pop that bubble just yet.
My gut screamed at me over whatever logic my head told me to just … keep my mouth shut about Finn.
Finn didn’t even know, so there wasn’t even really a secret to be brought out into the open. It was just, something I used to feel. Something I’d gotten over.
“What’s waiting for you when you get back?” he asked.
I smiled, happy for the change in subject. “Family dinner. We eat at Logan and Paige’s every week. It’s loud and crazy and … perfect.”
“All right, princess, tell me about them. Any group of people who make you smile like that, I’ve gotta know.”
Turning slightly in my seat, I took a moment to gauge his facial expression. Because his eyes were covered, I couldn’t get a true read on him, not really, but the rest of him looked relaxed and happy. Interested.
This was me and him outside of the cabin. Him getting to know the other parts of my life, and me, hopefully being able to do the same.
“Molly is the oldest,” I started. “She travels a lot because of her job with Amazon. She’s the assistant director for their documentary series,
All or Nothing.”
He nodded. “I remember when that came out. She and her boyfriend, Noah, right? The guy who plays for Washington.”
“Yup. So they miss dinner a lot, but whenever she’s in town, they’re there.”
“Next is”—he snapped his finger—“Isabel, right? The only one who didn’t try to glare me out of your apartment, which makes me prone to like her the best.”
I laughed. “Yes, she’s the middle. And the funny thing about that is that Isabel is usually the hardest to impress. She and Paige are two peas in a pod; they always have been. Isabel manages a gym, a kickboxing studio.”
“Nice.” He nodded appreciatively. “Have I heard of it?”
“Maybe. Wilson’s Gym and Kickboxing Studio.”
He shook his head. “I haven’t. Maybe … maybe we could check it out someday.”
My face felt warm and flushed and happy at how easily he suggested it. He was trying.
I licked my bottom lip, watching his face carefully. “You going to be in Seattle more?”
His grin hooked up on one side. “You know, I think I might be.” He squeezed my hand. “Even if the rest of your family hates me, at least I know Isabel is on my side.”
“Lia knows you,” I pointed out.
“Lia has spent more than ten years as best friends with the younger brother who’s gone his whole life hearing what a horrible influence I’d be on him. Trust me, your sister won’t be a fan of”—he glanced meaningfully at me—“this.”
I frowned. “She’s still my twin, though, and my best friend. When she sees …” My voice trailed off. It felt like a strange place to say something big and meaningful like when she sees how important you are to me.
When she sees how insanely happy you make me,
When she sees how wonderful you really are.
When she sees that I’m falling in love with you.
Bauer heard something in the pause and pulled his eyes from the road. “When she sees …?”
“Us,” I finished lamely. “I think if she’s able to see us,” I stammered slightly over my words, “you know, hanging out or whatever. She’ll be okay with it.”
New Book: Back Home to Marry Off Myself
Loredana’s father left the family for his mistress, leaving them to fend for themselves abroad. When life was at its toughest, her father showed up with “good news” after 8 years of absence: To marry off Loredana to a paralyzed son of the wealthy Mendelsohn family.