“What do you want to say, Chris?”
Tell her!
“I don’t see your mother,” I mumble.
Harper frowns. “What?”
Fuck! Why is this so fucking hard?
“When I look at you,” I tell her, thankful my sunglasses are obscuring the heat moistening my eyes.
“What do you mean?” she asks.
I run a hand across my jaw. “I’m not good at this, Harper.”
“Then stop trying so hard and just tell me what you mean.”
“Your mother,” I blurt. “Alice. That’s who you reminded me of after I came to the gas station that night. But when I look at you now, I don’t see her anymore. And I don’t see the young kid at her graveside either.”
She shuffles awkwardly, glancing at the floor.
“Okay. So what do you see?”
I clear my throat. “I see…”
Just tell her what you see!
“I see the sexiest, kindest, most talented woman I’ve ever laid eyes on.”
Harper’s chest stops rising as she holds her breath.
“You, Harper Reeves. I seeyou.”
Fuck. This kind of honesty is so uncomfortable.
“What does that even mea?-“
“You’reall I see,” I tell her. “Doesn’t matter where I am or what I’m doing,you are all I see. There could be a billion people in this room, and I’d find you in a millisecond. Because you’re not just standing there. You’re here…”
Harper lifts her twinkling blue eyes to my finger as I tap my head.
“And…” I say, clenching my fist.
I thought I’d experienced everything this life had to offer, but this is so fucking hard.
“And what?” she asks.
Tell her! Tell her she’s not just in your head, she’s also in your fucking heart!
I pick up my glass and down the champagne in one gulp.
“And what, Chris?” she repeats.
I wipe my mouth and crack my stiff neck. “I went to see Duncan Maguire today.”
She frowns.
“What does that have to do with…” Harper’s eyes grow wide. “The trucker guy who tried to touch me!”
“Yeah,” I sigh.
“Did you hurt him?” she asks, her body tensing.
“No.”
Unsure, she reaches up to my sunglasses and slides them off my face.
Shit. Every night as a child, I had a dream where I turned up to school naked. All my classmates pointed and laughed, and I’d wake up in a cold sweat, feeling so alone and vulnerable.
It was awful, but it was nothing compared to this. I feel like I’m standing on the edge of a cliff with nothing below to soften my landing.
“Tell me the truth, Chris,” she says, locking her blue eyes on mine. “Did you hurt him?”
I don’t blink as I shake my head. “No.”
She bites her lip. “Okay. Then why are you telling me? And what else did you want to say?”
This is it. Time to man up and take the leap.
“He had a golden Labrador in one of his family photos. Spitting image of Bouncer.”
“We were talking about Bouncer this morning,” she says.
“I know,” I say, my voice cracking. “And you asked me something…”
Jump, you fucking pussy! She deserves the truth.
“Did I?” Harper tilts her head. “About Bouncer?”
I nod. “Yeah.”
She bites her lip. “You’re going to have to help me out here, Chris, because?-“
“You asked me if I loved you like you loved Bouncer,” I say, my stomach flipping.
Harper freezes.
“And I don’t think the answer is a definite no anymore…”
Her mouth drops open.
“Way to make a girl feel special,” she mumbles. “You’re treating love like some kind of terminal illness.”
“And isn’t it?” I joke, raising a hand. “Sorry. I’m not good at this.”
She shakes her head. “Yeah. That’s an understatement. You didn’t even say it.”
“Because I don’t knowwhat this is!” I tell her as Maria approaches our table. “I have no frame of refere?-“
“This is the best day of my life!” Maria cackles. “Becca slapped Christina and grabbed her hair. She ended up looking like Sideshow Bob! I have it all on camera and…”
She glances at Harper, then me.
“Wow,” Maria says. “This is awkward. I guess I’ll just…yeah…”
She backs away to the next table and picks up a tray of cookies.
“Look at me,” I tell Harper.
“Why?” she mumbles. “You’re still leaving, so nothing changed.”
Before I can respond, my phone rings and I pull it from my pocket.
“What is it?” I snap, raising my hand to keep Harper right where she is.
“Problem, Boss. Big one,” Gary says. “We can’t find the guy who took the video through Duncan’s window.”
That’s what he came in to tell me when I was in Duncan’s living room. Some skater kid had been recording us through his window, but he ran away from my boys.
“And?” I hiss, stepping in front of Harper as she attempts to leave. “He’s just a child. What the fuck is he going to do?”
“That’s the problem, Boss. He’s posted it online and?-“
“What do I pay you for?” I shout. “We have people who can sort this shit. Get it taken down and do your fucking job!”
Ending the call, I lift my hands to Harper’s face.
“I don’t justwant you, Harper. I fuckingneed you. Is that clear enough?” Her eyes flicker. “But I have to leave because you will get hurt, and I can’t handle being the cause for any more of your tears.”
“Too late,” she mumbles, her blue eyes glistening. “You think I’d be able to paint you like that if you weren’t all I think about? You’re not the only one affected by this, Chris. It’s me too.”
“Exactly!” I tell her, stooping to meet her height. “It’syou I’m thinking about in all of this, not me. Because you’re not just some girl. But I fucking need you.”
I lower my voice and grab her wrist.
“Sometimes words don’t cut it,” I say. “So, how about you and me end whatever this is in my bed tonight?”
Harper’s pulse races against my finger as I reach a hand into my suit jacket.
“And wear this,” I whisper, handing her a black silk blindfold.
Harper picks it up with shaky fingers. “Are you embarrassed about liking me?”
New Book: Back Home to Marry Off Myself
Loredana’s father left the family for his mistress, leaving them to fend for themselves abroad. When life was at its toughest, her father showed up with “good news” after 8 years of absence: To marry off Loredana to a paralyzed son of the wealthy Mendelsohn family.