“I wasn’t asking you to bend to my whim, Mum.”
“Weren’t you?” She shook her head sadly. “You messaged your father at midnight the night before your match without so much as a please, it would mean something to me if you came.”
With my free hand, I gestured to Lia. “I wanted you to meet her, Mum. That’s why I wanted you to come to the match. Didn’t Lewis tell you?”
“I haven’t connected with your brother in a couple of weeks. We’ve been busy, and so is he. Doing our jobs.”
Lia lifted her head, giving me an unfathomable look.
I swallowed, wondering why I’d expected this to go any differently. “And who am I to understand real work, is that right?”
“I didn’t say that.”
“You didn’t have to,” I tossed back.
My mum exhaled, looking tired and older than I remembered. “Why did you come like this, Jude? What did you think would happen?”
It was on the tip of my tongue to tell her Lia was pregnant, that her first grandchild was on the way, and I’d never, ever make it feel the way they made me feel. But even five minutes with her, and everything went to shit. I might know exactly how to hit the self-destruct button on my relationship with my family, but even I wasn’t so stupid.
“Fuck if I know, Mum. Thought you could meet someone important to me and not have it explode at our feet, but I guess that was hoping for a bit too much, wasn’t it?”
Her chin wobbled, but she didn’t so much as blink.
“Tell Dad I said hello.”
Lia held fast when I tried to turn toward the car, and I gave her a questioning look, but her eyes were fastened on my mum.
“It was nice to meet you, Mrs. McAllister,” she said. Lia refused to budge until my mom’s shocked gaze came back to her face. “And I hope we can meet again soon under better circumstances. I’d love to hear more about what you do here.”
My mum let out a shaky breath and nodded. “Nice to meet you too, dear.”
Then instead of waiting for me to take the lead, Lia pivoted, all but dragging me back to the car, where she let go of my hand in order to climb back in.
She didn’t say a word until we’d driven down the dirt lane that led away from the farm, and when she did, I found myself bracing for a verbal tirade.
“Well,” she said softly, “that explains a lot, doesn’t it?”
I exhaled a laugh. “Yeah. I suppose.”
“At least when I get Isabel from the airport next week, I can tell her I’ve met your mother now.”
Pressing my foot on the accelerator I tried to ignore Lia’s strained tone, and the worried wrinkle in her brow. I tried to ignore the fact she didn’t hold my hand on the drive back. Or that when I dropped her off in Oxford, the kiss she gave me was subdued.
“Thank you for the lovely getaway,” she whispered, smoothing her hands along the collar of my shirt.
“Are you cross with me?” I asked, unable to stand the feeling that I’d just wedged a chasm between us.
“Not cross, no,” she said. “I’m … sad for you, I think. I don’t know exactly what I feel.”
That helped a bit but not entirely.
The one thing I seemed to do right suddenly felt precarious. I kissed her again, ignoring the way a couple of arseholes whistled as they passed.
She pulled away with a breathless laugh.
“Talk soon, yeah?” I asked.
Lia nodded. “Yeah.”
But as I drove away, I couldn’t shake the feeling that I’d just laid the groundwork for my own demise.
LIA
Isabel and I made it three days of blissful sister coexistence after she arrived.
At Heathrow, there was screaming and crying and hugging and soul-deep happiness that one of my people was finally here with me.
There was the requisite touristy stuff and jet lag recovery the first few days. We ate the bangers and mash and did bus tours, and she drank beer (I only snuck one sip because I really, really missed the occasional beer).
“Can we go in there? I think I need a Union Jack T-shirt.”
“You do know that we’ll pass about a hundred different stores exactly like this one.”
She grinned. “Indulge the tourist, please. If this is what will keep me awake until tonight, then you’re going to help me find a T-shirt.”
I held up my hands. “Fair enough.”
She was quicker than me, partially because her legs were longer, but also… not pregnant people were faster than pregnant people.
“Your bump is adorable,” she commented, flicking me a quick glance as she slid hangers down the rack.
I ran my hand over it. “I feel good. My energy picked back up around eleven weeks, but I swear, if I keep eating this many scones, I’m going to gain a thousand pounds.”
Isabel smiled as she held a shirt up to look at it. I could tell in her face she wasn’t sure what to say next.
“What is it?”
She carefully hung the shirt back up. “Nothing.”
I held up a white T-shirt covered in a black and white rendering of Queen Elizabeth with a red and blue lightning slash running down her face ala David Bowie.
Isabel grinned and motioned for it. “Perfect.”
We wandered a little bit after she got the shirt. Since Isabel wasn’t a student, I couldn’t take her inside the Rad Cam (the Radcliffe Camera, also known as one of Oxford’s most famous buildings), but I could show her my favorite place to sit and work. We worked our way through Oxford that way during the first couple of days, finding small nooks to sit where she could caffeinate, I could eat, and I’d get tiny snippets of what I was missing back home.
“What about Emmett?” I asked. “How’s he doing? He’s never around when I talk to anyone.”
Isabel smiled. “The little prince is fine. I already told him he’s going to be dethroned as the favorite when you give birth.”
“You did not.”
“Hell yeah, I did. Kid needs to be prepared.”
I rolled my eyes. “You have the tact of a semi-truck, Isabel. He’s nine. No one will be replacing anyone.”
She glanced at me over the rim of her cappuccino. “You’ll be living there, though, right? When you go home?”
My fingers plucked at the scone, and I took my time slathering cream and jam on it. It wasn’t the first probing question I’d gotten from my big sister, but it was just the most obvious.
New Book: Back Home to Marry Off Myself
Loredana’s father left the family for his mistress, leaving them to fend for themselves abroad. When life was at its toughest, her father showed up with “good news” after 8 years of absence: To marry off Loredana to a paralyzed son of the wealthy Mendelsohn family.